Friday, October 31, 2014

PSALM 143 - Scary Times

I remember the days of old. I meditate on all that You have done. I ponder the work of Your hands. I stretch out my hands to You. My soul thirsts for you like a parched land.
(Verses 5-6)   Italics, mine

Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits, Who forgives all your iniquity, Who heals all your diseases, Who redeems your life from the pit, Who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, Who satisfies you with good so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's. 
Psalm 103   Italics, mine

Remembering is a choice. Sometimes, a hard choice. It's easier to sit in the darkness of our circumstances and opine about all that is wrong, how we got there or that we'll never get out. And many of us have been in circumstances so depressing and hard that all we see is black. The enemy wants to take that pain and use it to obscure hope. Listening to the voice screaming at us in the dark that we are doomed and no one cares could become a 24-7 symphony of senselessness. A trick or treat served up by the devil himself to frighten us into submission. If we don't intentionally remember how loved we are by God, how God has retrieved us from the pit time and again, and that God is mightier than the enemy or our circumstances, we might just sit in the darkness for a long time.

Nancy's husband left her after a little over a year of marriage. He wasn't sure about whether he still wanted to be married. Was rather infatuated with a woman at work. Just didn't want to live with his new wife right then. Nancy adored her man. Grieved and grieved the loss. Found a little apartment. A good job and dragged her aching heart forward. What she didn't do was sit in the dark and vanish. In her heart she knew her husband would return. She knew her God works miracles. The answer wasn't instant. It took years before her husband came back wanting her again. If Nancy had weighed her circumstances in those years against the possibility her marriage would be renewed, she would have caved to despair. She chose instead to say, "I know God will answer this prayer." Her eyes looked up. Not out, at what was happening. They are still married many, many years later.

Cathette was my dearest friend. She discovered, at age 34, that she had breast cancer. On the same day I discovered I was pregnant with my son. I remember tiptoeing into her hospital room minutes after the surgeon told her he'd need to remove her breast. She'd married late--the year before. Always wanted children of her own. Chemotherapy would make that a long shot. My friend lay there with her long dark curls decorating the pillow beneath her head and smiled at me. "I am the Lord's." That was her response. Tears sparkled in her eyes. It was a hard diagnosis to hear. But Cathette chose to look at Him instead of her circumstances. She lived to adopt two amazing sons. Her cancer returned. But even in her last few weeks, her heart gained strength in Jesus. She called me one afternoon after she began the morphine that would finally make her sleep until her death, and said: "Thank you for leading me to Jesus. Thank you for teaching me to trust. I know where I am going. I know I will be with Him soon. I love you." Though we cried together, parting tears, even then my beautiful friend looked up.

Remembering to turn our eyes on what God has done in us in the past will assure us He will take care of us in our darkest moments. And they come. To everyone. Christians are not exempt from pain and trouble. But it could actually hone our focus, knowing we either groan and complain in the experience or choose to think about how big our God is. God is the only One Who can ease the terror of our times. The blanching of our hearts that makes them dry up and lose hope. Fear is a soul thing. No doubt we will need to talk with Him about what is going on. We are free to cry our pain out to Him as David does here. The point is, God listens. God has been faithful in the past. God will be faithful again...until we go home to Him. If we forget God and listen to the lies of the enemy, our pain will lead us into hopelessness. And it's easy to look at where we are in sickness, abandonment, chaos, brokenness or financial distress. Some of our circumstances are horrendous. That's exactly why we must choose to look to Jesus instead of looking around us. Living water on parched land produces fruit. Hands reached out in hope to Jesus will not come back empty. And even, as with Cathette, when we are walking through the valley of the shadow of death, we don't need to fear the evil one. Our God is with us. Never forget that.

Thursday, October 30, 2014

PSALM 143 - Soul Food

For the enemy has pursued my soul; he has crushed my life to the ground; he has made me sit in darkness like those long dead. Therefore my spirit faints within me; my heart within me is appalled.   (Verses 3-4)

For thus says the One Who is high and lifted up, Who inhabits eternity, Whose name is Holy: "I dwell in the high and holy place, and also with him/her who is of a contrite and lowly spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly, and to revive the heart of the contrite. For I will not contend forever, nor will I always be angry, for the spirit would grow faint before Me, and the breath of life that I made."  Isaiah 57  Italics, mine

Today Naghmeh Abedini announced that Saeed's mother will no longer be able to see him in prison. In fact, his mother must leave Iran or face prison herself. The Iranian government has doubled down on the request for clemency, saying there is no hope of it for Pastor Abedini. His mother collapsed into tears at the announcement and was taken to a nearby hospital. Pastor Abedini will now languish in the prison without benefit of visitors. Naghmeh said she is not shaken by the news because she wants no government to be glorified for her husband's release from prison, because God alone will do it. The message from Saeed was that he can feel all the prayers for him and they fill him with strength and courage to continue as a prisoner for the sake of Christ. And the enemy pursues their souls.

Saeed is not alone in his solitary cell. Not if what we believe is true. If what God says is right: that He dwells both in eternity and with those who love Him. Especially with the contrite and lowly. Who sit as if long dead in any prison the enemy constructs for our defeat. It is our souls he wants. Satan. To destroy them utterly. It is our souls he can't reach. They are reborn. They are not his to gain anymore. Our bodies are temporal, dust to dust. Eventually they fall away. Stripped of our tents, we are much more than physical: we are living spirits. Eternal in nature. It is that spirit Satan wants to destroy. Once our souls are held captive, our bodies will follow suit. I don't think there is any way Pastor Abedini could encourage others that he is strengthened and renewed if Jesus were not present with him in ways only the captive can know. May he be set free today from the nightmare Satan has thrown him into.

When we are held physically captive by the enemy, whether in an actual jail or in sickness or crisis, we must live from the soul. That connection we have with Jesus is our lifeblood, our only strength, our bread and water. Brought down to the most primal link to life. No earthly options left. I know it's what Jesus meant when He compared Himself to manna in the John 7 and when in John 6 He told us we would need to eat His flesh and drink His blood. It's not draconian. It's truth. When it all comes down to our souls and what they need to survive, it is living water, the bread of life (His Word) and the blood of His sacrifice, which makes us right with God. Those who conquer the evil one in ultimate victory do so by the blood of the Lamb, by the word of their testimony and by the fact that they loved not their lives even to their deaths (Revelation 12). The blood of Jesus is what makes our souls reborn. Remembering what Jesus saved us from, our lives without Him, and what He has done since we gave ourselves to Him is a powerful incentive to live for Him and a visceral reminder that He is real. But when we are asked to die for our faith in Jesus, it is our soul who must make the choice of which is greater: our life on Earth or our eternal life with Him. If our soul is uncultivated and asleep, fat with earthly gluttony, we are prey for the taking.

Never think God is too far away to meet us in our dark places. Though He made us to have bodies of flesh and blood, it is our souls for which He yearns. And it is there that He connects. Jesus Himself was in a place of darkness with those long dead, wrapped in the linen cloths of His burial, when the Spirit of God made Him live again. That same Spirit lives in us. To energize and strengthen our souls and our bodies. Satan lost the battle for my soul. He can't have it! No doubt he will try again and again. He has in the past. Satan is trying now with Saeed Abedini. But what the pastor knows is: If God be for us, who can be against us? He Who did not spare His own Son but gave Him up for us all, how will He not also graciously give us all things?...in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him Who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8

With that same Spirit we have the privilege of crying, Abba (Daddy), as children of God. Abba, today, be with our brother Saeed and with all those who are held physically captive because of their faith in You. Feed his soul, pour living water into his lifeblood and hold in Your vast arms his contrite and lowly spirit. And contend with those who hold him in prison as only You can. Please set him physically free to Your great glory. Amen.

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

PSALM 143 - Throne Room Etiquette

Hear my prayer, O Lord; give ear to my pleas for mercy! In Your faithfulness answer me, in Your righteousness! Enter not into judgment with Your servant, for no one living is righteous before You.   (Verses 1-2)

Why should God listen to me when I pray? What could compel Him to do such a thing? In order to get into the White House to see a sitting president, I'd have to be somebody. I don't have access to Queen Elizabeth or the Pope. There are protocols to be observed in order to be led into the presence of people the world considers important. Only family has access to the public and private quarters of celebrities and princes. So how is it that I get to go into the throne room of God and have a private conversation? If it has anything to do with my being such an amazing person, a virtual paragon of righteousness, I'm doomed from the start. There would be no foxhole confessions that God honors. No last minute forgiveness. If God's protocol was that we had to be perfect in order to come into His presence...well, we'd all be lost.

I believe one of the most astonishing things about my God is that He has always wanted to live with those whom He has created in His image. To dwell with mankind in fellowship. It was the design in the garden and is the design in heaven. Always the same goal. He isn't eaten up with His own glory as earthly dignitaries are. God is holy because that is what He is. He isn't set apart like we are because we are all about how much more special we are than those who grovel at our feet. God's clout is the natural state of Who He is--absolutely set apart and pure. In order to bridge the gap between our behavior and His rightness, God set foot on the Earth He created. Came as the God-man, Jesus. Actually lived not only in Spirit here with us, but in flesh, also. Tempted as we are, but without sin. Knowing what it's like to live in a body destined for death. Jesus not only took on flesh, but He also took on the penalty for all the wrong things we've done in our own flesh. Why? A holy God demanded justice for our wrongs. So He took the punishment on Himself. On the altar of sacrifice to which Jesus was nailed. There we were brought to justice. There our sins were atoned. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every way has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then come boldly before the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4.  (italics, mine)

Our access to God was costly. Our protocol is our reliance on the death penalty Jesus took to cover our sins. If I careen into the throne room on my own recognizance, I don't have God's ear. If I gloat over how God should love me because I tithe and don't swear (all the time), how I served in the soup kitchen three times in one month and I've never stolen so much as a grape at the grocery store, I fear God might yawn and have me dragged out of His courts. None of those are bad things, but they are not the basis upon which I gain entrance into God's arena. My ability to come boldly into the presence of God is based solely upon my relationship with Jesus. I have nothing to commend myself personally to the Father. No one on earth does. We are fall short of God's holiness. I don't want justice when I pray. I want mercy. The mercy offered me by the death penalty Jesus paid so I would go free. The fact that I rely on the sacrifice Jesus made to give me life also makes me a child of God. Jesus brought me to His Father and said, "She is one of Ours." What loving Father wouldn't want to talk with his daughter? This daughter never wants to refuse the invitation.

 

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

PSALM 142 - Do Guess Jeans Make Life Complete?

Lord, I cry out to You. I say, "You are my protection! You are all I want in this life." Listen to my cry because I am helpless. Save me from those who are chasing me. Free me from my prison and then I will praise Your name. Then good people will surround me because You have taken care of me.   (Verses 5-7)

I guess one good thing about being deep in a cave was that David could holler and not be heard. Cry out to God his torment and scream his need without worrying about who might hear it, other than God. I think what David is yelling is important. It's not self-talk. "God is my protection. He's all I need." No! It's an in-your-face declaration of absolute love and affirmation that his God is all he wants. When life is pared down to only the essentials, is that the cry of my heart? "God, You are all I want!"?

"I really want a pair of Guess jeans for Christmas," Vanessa begged when she was twelve. "If I get a pair of Guess jeans, my life will be complete." Yeah. She actually said that. Which is why Bill and I did without for a month or so to buy them for Christmas. We didn't have much money at the time. Our family had recently been through hell, though, with the arrest of my father and the death of my mother, so to be able to make Vanessa's life complete sounded like a great idea. I never understood the hype about Guess jeans. They are pretty much ordinary jeans with a triangle on the pocket. But Vanessa was ebullient when she opened them Christmas and her life was complete...for about a week. Longer than I expected, really. Our capacity to want seems insatiable.

I wanted not to hurt anymore. Not to feel the aching pain of the things that happened to our family. That want is a pit so deep there is no bottom. The potential to throw things into the depths of that darkness is without end. It's soul-burning, mind bending, body tormenting need. Too busy with life to acknowledge it properly and too angry at my heavenly Father to run there, you can imagine the torment my wanter put me through. The irony of what I discovered, though, is this: God is all I want...and need. Struggling to my cave after my crazy, in the darkness of solitude and in the retreat from the enemy of my soul, I found Him there. Waiting to deliver me from the original pain and from the consequent pain I'd dragged myself into. Nothing else mattered in that cave dwelling experience. I didn't want a new car, diamond rings, new relationships, a glass of wine, a trip to the Bahamas...no appetite for anything but the Presence of my Beloved.

When my father-in-law lay dying a couple of years ago, I was holding his hand and rubbing his forehead. He was getting farther and farther away. It was obvious. His breathing became shallow, the breath from his body trickling out in tiny puffs. Jesus close on the other side. Dad's family close on this side. And that was all there was. I have his watch. A jar of change he kept with a two dollar bill inside. The stuff of his life in his room. His hearing aids and false teeth. His bed and dresser. All his earthly possessions still here when he was there. And that was all that mattered. That he was there. With the One Who is all we should really ever want. Because what else is there that's eternal? That doesn't fill only a temporary need?

Maybe it takes a cave experience for us to examine the very core of ourselves to see if we really do love God. If, when it all comes down to our barest needs, our most precious desires, we find them wrapped up in the heart of God toward us. That in communion with Him, even if its origin is our fiercest desperation, we find the sweetest spot in our earthly lives. A preview of heaven and home. When we are stripped of all the former joys and sick of wanting what doesn't really satisfy, we are sated with the Presence of the One Who loved us first.

One thing have I asked of the Lord. That I will seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in His temple.
Psalm 27:4
 

Monday, October 27, 2014

PSALM 142 - Waiting Out Crazy

When I am afraid, You, Lord, know the way out. In the path where I walk, a trap is hidden for me. Look around me and see. No one cares about me. I have no place of safety. No one cares if I live.  (Verses 3-4)

David writes this psalm from the cave at Adullam, a desert place halfway between the cities of Gath and Bethlehem. He was there in an effort to escape King Saul whose jealousy toward David was epic. In his getaway, David stopped by the dwelling in Nob of Ahimelech, the priest, where David was given holy bread from the altar and the sword of Goliath. With these, David ran to Gath to Achish, its king. In the palace of that great king, David heard the servants making fun of him. "Isn't this the mighty David, anointed king of Israel. The one everyone sang and danced around saying, 'Saul has killed his thousands and David his ten thousands'?" Ashamed and embarrassed, David's fear of the king made him further humiliate himself by pretending to be a crazy man, drooling down his beard and writing incomprehensible things on the city gates. Achish was angry with his men for even allowing a madman into the courts. David escaped and ran. To the cave. Alone.

We don't have to wonder what he was thinking there as he lodged like a trapped animal in the dank darkness of his isolation. It had to be confusing to be anointed to be king while a king still ruled over Israel. To know God's will for his life was to take Saul's place, yet Saul is still on the throne. David's life seemed to be going nowhere fast. Claustrophobic in the caverns, agoraphobic about leaving it, David sat and prayed. Not a flowery assertion of his great faith in his God, but a sincere What the heck am I doing here and how will I ever get out kind of conversation with the Lord. And in the moment, David was right. Add to that no one knew where he was. It was dark, dark, dark.

David didn't just need a way out of the cave, he needed a way out of his situation. The call of God on his life looked diametrically opposed to the situation in which he found himself. He was out of energy and hopelessly alone. No vision for what was next for him. Only the certain hope that God knows the way out of not only the cave but the circumstances. We don't know how long David hid there. But God was busy working things out. First, somehow his father and brothers found out where he was. And his mother. If there was ever a time when he needed his mom, it was then. They came to him. I'm sure mom had a basket of her best biscuits, though the Bible doesn't say that. But another interesting thing happened that changed David's path forever. All the other down-and-outers in the area went to be with David in his cave. Those who had debts they couldn't pay, men whose lives had turned them bitter, men in great distress. Four hundred of them! In short, an army of misfits who needed a leader. Who better to take on the job than the would-be king without a throne? They respected David's situation. Related to his humiliation. It's not until David had his mom and dad safely in the hands of the king of Moab that a priest from Gad told David to leave the cave and go to Judah. While David sat and waited on God, God put together an army of unlikely men whose loyalty to and love for David changed the course of his life. They weren't the cream of the Judah crop. But God hand-picked each one of them to be honored alongside their future king.

I don't think I go too far today to say some of us have drooled down our chins and acted like crazies because we had no idea what God was doing and we were afraid. We'd lost our way and did things we never thought we'd catch ourselves doing. If we are blessed, our Father puts us in a cave for a little while. Some quiet time. Introspection and prayer is a good way to wait out the confusion life becomes for us sometimes. Stop acting out. Stop trying to fix it all. Stop trying to figure out what God is doing in our lives. Sit in the darkness, let it surround us, and wait for the light. David's path came right up to the door of the cave. Fetched him. Gave him new direction with new friends who would become David's Mighty Men. I'm absolutely positive it didn't look anything like David thought it would! We can pretty much expect God to work in unexpected ways. But, God already knew what He was going to do. Hadn't He been the One to tell Samuel to anoint the ruddy teenager as Saul's replacement? What God ordains, He sustains. Sometimes He must wait out our crazy, though.

Thursday, October 23, 2014

PSALM 142 - This is War!!

I cry out to the Lord. I pray to the Lord for mercy. I pour out my problems to Him. I tell Him my troubles. When I am afraid, You, Lord, know the way out.  (Verses 1-2)

I met Dorothy Sawer this morning when I read the Los Angeles Times. I kinda fell in love with her. Gap-toothed and lovely, wearing a floral print dress splashed with orange flowers with blue splotches that look like water flowing around the fabric, Dorothy sits in a picture of herself holding her large, worn Bible.  She is beautiful. She's Liberian. A mother of six children. A wife abandoned several years ago by her husband. When she was a child, though, she had an encounter that changed her life forever. Dorothy saw a flash of light in which a white man with long hair stood with his back to her. A second flash of light took the vision away. She's always believed it to be an angel of God. From that time on, Dorothy has had a gift. She has premonitions. She has a dogged faith in the power of Christ to heal. Dorothy has been a prayer warrior at her local church for the past four years--Conqueror's Tabernacle. Her battle now? Ebola. It has taken the lives of her pastor and his wife, whose generosity of spirit put them in direct contact with neighbors dying from the virulent disease. When the pastor's wife became ill, Dorothy cared for her, holding her hand and praying for her morning and night. The prayer warrior's prayers couldn't save her pastor's wife. Nor her pastor.

When Dorothy thought her stomach was on fire, when the fever hit, she fasted and prayed for three days. When the symptoms didn't ease up, she left her kids in the care of her eldest son and went to a treatment center for Ebola. Diagnosed with the disease, Dorothy asked for only one thing. A Bible. Unafraid. No doubt. She was going to live. Lying in her sweat and pain, Dorothy prayed and read her Bible for many days. Then one night she felt a light tap on her shoulder. "I think it was the Spirit of God," she explains. Because? The next morning she was fine. Ebola exited her body as quickly as it had entered, and Dorothy went home.

Next to succumb to the symptoms of the disease was her son who'd kept the family together for her. He left the family as she did to go to the treatment facility. Dorothy  heard nothing for the days her son was gone. But with her Bible opened and with much loud praying (a thing she says: "I pray loud and louder."), she fought a spiritual battle over her son's physical one. And...he came home well.

I know it's not the outcome for so many who love Jesus. Dorothy's explanation of why others have died when she lived: "I believe it must be God's will. Or maybe some people don't have faith that they can make it...or give up hope." But for me, today when I read of her trust I was struck by the fact that Ebola isn't too difficult for our God. In the midst of Dorothy's excruciating pain and burning fever, she looked at Jesus, not at the disease. I was also struck by the fact that for Dorothy, it was going to be okay either way out. Here or there. Accustomed to crying out her troubles and the troubles of others to the Lord, she handled scourge the same way she handled everything else in her life--with prayer. Loud prayer!

She continues to pray for those in her neighborhood and in her church, but she doesn't touch them anymore. Life goes forward with problems and troubles. Just like it does for us. Dorothy's habit was spiritual warfare. Perhaps the enemies of her friends and neighbors in the small Liberian village where she lives are more obvious to her than our enemies are to us. But if we don't know how to war on our knees in times of personal peace, we will find ourselves weak and vulnerable in the trenches. What a privilege it is that we have the ear of the Commander in Chief of everything! Pray loudly into it today your every trouble, your every need. The battle is His! And we, God's warrior princesses and princes. Gear up! Fully armed. This battle isn't for the weak of heart and mind.
 

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

PSALM 141 - Don't Take the Bait!!


God, I look to You for help. I trust in You, Lord. Don't let me die. Protect me from the traps they set for me and from the net that evil people have spread. Let the wicked fall into their own nets, but let me pass by safely.   (Verses 8-10)

The world baits us. Ever notice that? Trying to trip us up in our faith or trying to make us become hypocrites. As a rule, the world doesn't need much. Because we are weak in our resolve and lax in nurturing our relationship with our Father, we are often quickly felled by those who would trap us into compromise. And I'm not just talking about things like the Houston mayor ordering the sermons of local pastors to be presented to her for her review and permission. That's constitutional violation as well. The traps set for us are often much more subtle and appeal to our wants and needs.

In the Bible study I taught last night, we came to the story in John 7 when the brothers of Jesus baited Him. They didn't believe in His divinity. Thought Jesus was trying to make a name for Himself. The men, including James and Jude, had heard about the things Jesus said He was doing in Capernaum and Galilee. The brothers weren't there. Some of the disciples other than the twelve probably hadn't seen the crippled man walk, the water turned to wine or the two fish and five loaves of bread multiplied to feed over five thousand people. With the Feast of Tabernacles fast approaching, His brothers said to Jesus, "This is the perfect time for you to show off in Judea! If you really are doing these fantastic things, go show yourself at the feast. No one who wants to promote himself does his stuff in private. If you really do all these things you and the people talk about, go show the world!" John footnotes, His brothers didn't believe in Him. What the brothers didn't know and Jesus didn't tell them was that the Jews in Judea already wanted to kill Him...and it wasn't time for that...yet. "You go up to the feast. I am not going up to this feast because My time has not yet fully come."

They left and Jesus went later, quietly, by Himself. He waited a few days then went to the temple to teach. Brilliantly. Stunning the teachers and the congregants. They marveled at Him and wondered where He obtained such knowledge since he hadn't been to seminary. "From Him Who sent Me..." Jesus began. Then He spoke to the baiting of his brothers: "Those who teach their own ideas are trying to get honor for themselves. But those who try to bring honor to the one who sent Him, speak the truth and there is nothing false in them."

It didn't work. The brothers of Jesus weren't able to make Him do tricks for the world to see...and for them to ogle at. Jesus could have done that. Just like He could have performed for Satan by jumping off the pinnacle of the temple and being saved by angels, turning stones into bread (He had, after all, created manna for years in the wilderness), or ruling not just Jerusalem, but the entire world. But all those lures were counter to His purpose. And Jesus was smart enough to know it. Single minded in His desire to do the will of the Father while He was the God-Man from heaven. That purpose was to purchase our salvation and to show us the heart of the Father. So going with his brothers to the feast in order to be the side-show for all to watch wasn't the way Jesus was to become famous.

It must have burned a little to have the younger brothers make fun of Him. Jesus had grown up in the same household with them. How much of His greater destiny they knew isn't spoken much of in the Bible. When Jesus was twelve, He stunned the teachers at synagogue in Jerusalem where He was "about His Father's business." His family, though, lost Jesus on their way home and had to travel back to town to find Him. Irksome, maybe. The brothers thinking their big brother a bit odd. But not the Messiah. Mary and Joseph had to have made clear the story of the birth of Jesus, the angels, the blessings of Anna and the prophecies of Simeon on the day of His circumcision. The brothers and sisters of Messiah had, no doubt, heard the stories. But it wasn't until Jesus was thirty that things started happening. So why now? Let's see what you've got.

What if Jesus had caved to the pressure of his half-siblings and gone with them to Judea to rock the city with His miracles? To reach out His hands to heal the sick, free the demon-possessed, feed the multitudes and accept the accolades. The whole fireworks show they wanted. What if He'd moved ahead of God and put on the spectacle of which He was certainly capable? Because His brothers made fun of Jesus. "I'll show them I'm really the Messiah! I'll blow them away! I made this planet and I can take it out!" We wouldn't be saved today. That's what. For Messiah did miracles only to point to the cross. To show us our deeper need. Multiplying bread to show us our hunger is not for bread alone. Healing our uncleanness to show us He can wash us new. Defeating demons so we would know we can be eternally free. Tossing out money changers at the temple because we were going to need fresh earthly tabernacles as the new temple in which God desires to dwell. All that would have been lost if Jesus had listened to the bait and wowed Judea with His powers. The brothers would have the notoriety they sought. Hey, look at our big brother, man! But all else would have been lost. Including their own salvation.

James probably didn't believe until Jesus rose again. I Corinthians 15 records that the risen Jesus appeared to James alone. Can you imagine what that looked like? No more doubt. Big brother now big Savior and a lifetime of living with Jesus was understood in the moment James looked at His feet and touched His hands. This is why I couldn't take the bait. And James became the leader of the church in Jerusalem. Devoted to the wholehearted knowledge that his earthly half-brother was indeed Messiah! Wrote the book of James in the New Testament. James died for that truth, hurled, according to Josephus and Hegesippus, by order of the high priest and the Sanhedrin after the death of Festus, into the Kidron Valley from the top of the temple area wall. James didn't die immediately from the fall and was mercifully clubbed to death by a passerby from Siloam in order to put him out of his misery. Fifteen years after Jesus died. No compromised faith. James was sure enough of what he believed to live and die for it. Not taking the bait of the religious elite himself, James believed in Jesus to the end.

I don't want to take the bait either. Never again. Money is more important than character. Power is better than integrity. Cheating will get me further than always telling the truth. Rushing into my own decisions is more effective than waiting on God. Just this once won't hurt. Gossip. Hate. Coveting. Looking the other way. Looking the wrong way. Always going for the shiny object. When greater destiny is at stake. No thanks. Oh, Jesus, let me pass by safely without biting.

"But watch yourselves lest your hearts be weighed down with dissipation and drunkenness and cares of this life, and that day come upon you suddenly like a trap. For it will come upon all who dwell on the face of the whole earth. But stay awake at all times, praying that you may have strength to escape all these things that are going to take place, and to stand before the Son of Man."  Jesus, Luke 21   Italics, mine

Amen.

 

Monday, October 20, 2014

PSALM 141 - Shame On You?

Let a righteous man strike me--it is a kindness; let him rebuke me--it is oil for my head; let my head not refuse it. Yet my prayer is continually against evil deeds. When their judges are thrown over the cliff, then they shall hear my words, for they are pleasant. As when one plows and breaks up the earth, so shall our bones be scattered at the mouth of Sheol.
(Verses 5-7)

Do not reprove a scoffer or he will hate you. Reprove a wise man and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man and he will be still wiser. Teach a righteous man and he will increase in learning. Reverence for the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight.           Proverbs 9

They sit outside and look through the window at our family dining together. It's intimate and sweet, our time with our Father. Served up for us is joy, peace, wisdom and understanding. The aroma of it floats outside, wafting into the nostrils of those who would break the glass and intrude on our serenity. My brothers and sisters are there. Because we have the same Abba, are born of the same Spirit, we tend to think alike about the things that matter to God. However, we are not all alike by any means. I have a sister whose gift of leading worship draws us all into the Presence of our Father when we are far away. A brother whose generosity has saved many of us from defeat. We need each other. And when a sister comes to me to tell me where I fall short, I listen. Knowing she loves me and hears from our Father. Also usually knowing I have missed the mark and Abba has sent her to me to draw me back in reverence to Him. It's how our family works. But our table has been prepared in the presence of our enemies (Psalm 23). Let's not forget they watch in scorn as we dine with the Creator and Lover of our souls.

I had a long night of prayer last night. I really needed to be with my Father. There comes to me sometimes an overwhelming desire to crash into His presence and lie at His feet. Last night He seemed to want me near His chest. To hear His heart. And it was, in part, this: The judgment of the world creates shame. It is the tool of the enemy from the Garden of Eden until now. I think it is why Jesus said, in John 3, that He didn't come into the world to condemn it, but to save it. In their hiding from God after they disobeyed, Adam and Eve were ashamed. Covered their naked bodies with leaves and hid from their Creator. Shame told them they were vulnerable. Disobedience stole their freedom. Jesus got that freedom back for us. Slapped shame across the face. Crushed it with His heel. So that the enemy can no longer define us. The Spirit does. And the Word. It is for our benefit that we are corrected and convicted of the things we do that offend God. But there is, therefore, no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, for the law of the Spirit has set you free in Christ Jesus (Romans 8).

Correction isn't meant to foster shame, but blessing. To correct our paths. To deepen our love for God. And in my time with God last night, praying for myself and others, I felt the eyes of the enemy who would encroach in judgment jealously watching the scene. Banging on the windows to scream an invective against me and those for whom I prayed. Abba silenced him. No judgment before the Father because I am His child. Bought at a very dear price. But I am aware that this table set before me, where I fellowship with my God, makes the enemy mad. Just as our relationship with God makes the world hate us, too. We are judged as phony, hypocritical, self-righteous...on and on. And we can listen to that and cave to the politically correct, or we can hold to the standards of our faith, accept correction and discipline from the Head of our family, and eschew shame.

In the end, when the fields are plowed and all of our bones are dug up from their graves, God will be the final judge of where we belong eternally. It is for us who know Him to live before our Father in holy reverence and communal joy, not taking on the judgments of a world that laughs at us, ridiculing our faith. It is not for us to judge them, either. Nor to be frustrated that trying to correct their thinking gets us nowhere. Scoffers hate us for trying to do that. Believe we are stupid. That we don't think correctly. What we are called to do is press into the Father's heart, seek Him, learn from Him. There will always be those looking on from the outside and misinterpreting our family time. May they see a thing for which they yearn instead of an elite dinner to which they weren't invited. For our Father will open the door to all who knock (Revelation 3).

Friday, October 17, 2014

PSALM 141 - Feeling Squeezed?

Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips! Do not let my heart incline to any evil, to busy myself with wicked deeds in company with men who work iniquity, and let me not eat of their delicacies!  (Verses 3-4)

Don't let the world squeeze you into its own mold, but let God remold your minds from within, so that you may prove in practice that the plan of God for you is good, meets all His demands and moves toward the goal of true maturity.  Romans 12

Feeling squeezed today? A square peg trying to fit into a round hole? I think the question here is, "What are we willing to compromise to get what we want in this world?" It's more nefarious than it seems. This pressure to be successful, be loved, be beautiful, be powerful, be admired, be all the world claims makes us worthwhile. There is subtle and not-so-subtle pressure put on us from all sides. Magazines, billboards, movies, television and even social media define who we ought to be. Skinny, tall, smart, buff...you know the drill. Are you gluten-free? A gym rat? Politically correct? Are your jeans designer? Coffee snob? What's squeezing us today?

I just read the story of Asia Bibi, a Pakistani Christian woman sentenced to death for blasphemy. Her crime? She dirtied the vessels of the berry pickers with whom she worked by using the same cup as they were drinking from. As a Christian, she is "unclean" and her lips defiled their water. The women began to argue over the situation then went back to work. Later the Muslim women told a local cleric about the altercation and soon an angry mob stormed Asia's home and savagely beat her and some of her family. She was then arrested and charged with blasphemy. Sentenced to die by hanging. Two prominent political figures who tried to help Ms. Bibi were assassinated. In her book, Blasphemy, Ms. Bibi wrote that she was tired of being a second class citizen because of her religion and was weary of always being told she must convert to Islam. She stood up for her faith. That is her crime.The local cleric to whom she was then dragged told her the only way out for her was to convert to Islam and obey Sharia law. She could not. The Lahore High Court of Appeals upheld her death sentence yesterday.

It would have been the easy route. Denying her faith in Christ. Asia has a husband and three children. Since 2009, she has been away from them. Because of her unrepentant love for Jesus. I doubt she's worried about whether her coffee is designer or whether she got to her workout at L.A. Fitness today. Her goal isn't to be the most beautiful thing to hit the prison in Pakistan nor is she fretting over whether or not the meal shoved under her door is free of MSG. Because she didn't take the easy way out, her way is very hard. And those uncompromising men who tried to help her are now murdered. It matters that she preferred her faith over the delicacies of those who would make her recant.

The things we do aren't evil in and of themselves, of course. I work out. I have designer jeans. But when they begin to define me, I've sunk from the higher things that matter to God. He's not so concerned that my triceps don't flap as He is that my heart doesn't falter. God doesn't go out of His way to make sure I get my grande latte from Starbuck's, but He is wanting me to gulp living water by the cupsful. We will be challenged for our faith even more than we are now. Houston mayor Annise Parker just made that clear. Preachers must show her their sermons if they mention gender differences. Don't be squeezed. Suffocated because you love Christ. Speaking the truth in love (Ephesians 4), let's grow up, mature into a body that is unwavering in our commitment to Him. Not nodding in agreement, joining in the conversations of the world, looking just like it, when we know we are only passing through.

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

PSALM 141 - What Is That Smell?

O Lord, I call upon You. Hasten to hear me! Give ear to my voice when I call to You! Let my prayer be counted as incense before You, and the lifting of my hands as the evening sacrifice!
(Verses 1-2)

Ever had a morning when you woke up with a heavy heart? This is one of those for me. I was praying before I even opened my eyes today. So much I can't control. So much I yearn to see my Father do. Bill was up and at work. The room was quiet. So I cried out. For our nation. For my kids. For all our hearts and lives. Prayed that our Father would equip us for these times, and my children and grandchildren for their journey on what appears to be the Titanic, nationally and internationally. I read yesterday of the seven bowls the seven angels will pour out (Revelation 16) in the end times. How the Middle East will be central and (verse 19) the cities of the nations will fall. Doom. Yet in my praying, I couldn't escape the fact that since my Father knows our times--and the end of them seen from the beginning of them--it is for me to trust and hang on. I was not surprised, in light of my early morning conversation with God, that this is the verse I should come to. Be quick, my Father, to hear me. To know that in this clamoring, fighting, unsettled world noisy with dissent and hate, I am heard.

The altar of incense was set right in front of the veil that hid the Most Holy Place from view. It was to be lit morning and night, never to go out. And ONLY with fire from the sacrificial altar. Coals splattered with the blood of the sacrifices, smoldering before the dwelling place of God in sweet aroma. The incense was a very specific blend of spices and perfume that could only be used on the altar. When one walked into the Holy Place, it was to smell like God. The aroma of our Lord. Our aroma to Him. It is our prayers, this incense (Revelation 5). Fueled by the coals taken from the altar of our Lamb. Precious to the Lord. Can you see Him breathe it in when we come to sit with Him in prayer? The sweet aroma of a child of His coming near. How much sweeter still our privilege to be heard.

Two lambs, perfect, without blemish, were sacrificed each day on the altar outside of the tent of meeting. One in the morning; one at twilight. A continual offering up for the atonement of our sins. The offering also included grain, salt, oil and grape juice (wine). Both offerings were an acknowledgment that God's people needed Him, His forgiveness and love. It was a picture of God's ability to preserve us, the power of the Holy Spirit and a constant reminder of the fact that our sin is costly to the point of shed blood. I understand this morning why David asked the Father to see his lifted hands, surrendering to Yahweh, the Almighty, as an evening sacrifice. I need the atonement offered by the sacrificial Lamb of God in order to be forgiven and heard.

It was the presence of the incense and the sacrifices that made a way for us to meet with God. "It shall be a regular burnt offering throughout your generations at the entrance of the tent of meeting before the Lord, where I will meet with you to speak with you there (Exodus 29)." There are no more sacrifices being offered in the tabernacle today. There is no tabernacle. Destroy in 70 A.D., the temple no longer exists. The sacrifice of the Lamb was enough. Once for all. God tore down the earthly dwelling place. He now dwells within all who lift their hands and hearts to Him as they inhale the fragrant sacrifice of the His Son. Little tabernacles alit with holy fire, ignited by the coals taken from the bowl outside the Tent of Meeting. God speaks with me in this holy place where His Spirit dwells. The incense of my prayers reaching His nostrils; the lifting of my surrendered heart a precious reminder of the Lamb. I am heard.

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

PSALM 140 - Jesus Loves Me, This I Know

I know the Lord will get justice for the poor and will defend the needy in court. Good people will praise His name; honest people will live in His presence.  (Verses 12-13) Italics, mine

Enemy, don't laugh at me! I have fallen, but I will get up again. I sit in the shadow of trouble now, but the Lord will be a light for me. I sinned against the Lord, so He was angry with me, but He will defend my case in court. He will bring about what is right for me. Then He will bring me out into the light, and I will see Him set things right.  Micah 7:8-9  Italics, mine

What do you know the Lord will do? Will is a faith word. Spoken in confidence. "I will be there at 8." You can count on it. Don't give it another thought. If I have a habit of not showing up on time or at all, then my saying I will be there won't mean a thing to anyone. As in Kay never does what she says she will. That would be a character flaw that often makes me out to be a liar. Based upon my history with my Father, there are things I know He will do. I know God will fight for me when I'm the underdog. I know, though imperfectly, that He loves me. That is the thing that changes me every day. I know I will see Him someday. God feels just that close. And He promised I would. My Father keeps His promises. These verses have to do with knowing that God is just and that He is a God of mercy. A dichotomy of terms. How can One be absolutely right and still give us mercy?

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." Jesus got away from the crowds that followed Him wanting healing and deliverance. With His disciples, Jesus climbed to a mountaintop and sat down to just be with them. His twelve. Jesus had some things to say; some things He had to teach the men who would carry on after His death. And this is the first thing out of His mouth. "Happy are those who know they need God." The poor. In spirit. Bankrupt and empty without God. The real indigent. The pearl of great price gives riches to everyone. If money is the idol, the man is destitute. If Jesus is the prize, the poor  man has it all. For every need. The kingdom of heaven, here and eternally, is for those who know they are bankrupt without Him.

I am intrigued by the mention of God's defense of us in court. What court? His, I believe. He is The Judge. It is up to God to decide our fate, ultimately and in the short term. I memorized these verses from Micah when I was far away from Him, slopping around in the mud of my miry pit. I'd virtually jumped into it. No fault of God's. If I'd cried out for justice in that moment, I'd not be here to write this blog post. My God had every available reason to leave me just where I was. But I looked around and understood the degradation of my circumstances, the pain of my pit. And what I knew my God would do was save me. Knew it with all my heart. No Why would I come down there and get you? response was on His tongue. Mercy triumphs over judgment (James 2:13) My father prefers to rescue me. So sitting down there in the dark I cried out for some light. Just a little, even. Enough to see Him again. Oh, He wasn't pleased with me. Angry, in fact. But He loves me. This I know. Dragged into court with the enemy to accuse me (rightly), I had an advocate Satan can't win against with all of his prosecutorial skills. My Father if the Judge. And with all the evidence against me, Jesus is Who God saw. Standing there, pleading my case. This one belongs to Me. Gavel sounds. Case dismissed! And I walk free. Consequences, yes. Guilt and shame, no. Someone already went to prison and the cross to pay the eternal penalty for all my obvious and not so obvious sins.

Jesus wasn't finished with me, though. I still smelled like my pit, carried the detritus of my mire. It took a while to clean me up. To set things straight again. But He did it in me. Shone the Light on what needed rearranging. What defense attorney does all that? Only One Who took my place on the dock. See why I trust Him? Why I know He will do all He says He will? We have a past that assures me of the present. God is a merciful Judge. A loving Father. And a lover of those who are poor and know it.


 

Monday, October 13, 2014

PSALM 140 - The Right Side of Wrong

As for the head of those who surround me, let the mischief of their lips overwhelm them! Let burning coals fall upon them! Let them be cast into the fire, into miry pits, no more to rise! Let not the slanderer be established in the land; let evil hunt down the violent man speedily!
(Verses 9-11)

If possible, as far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, "Vengeance is Mine, I will repay," says the Lord. To the contrary, if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head. Do not be overcome with evil, but overcome evil with good.  Romans 12   Italics, mine

Well, that's just hard! Really. It's much easier to think like David did in the Old Testament times. Kill 'em! After all, they have offended us, nearly ruined us...or ruined us..., gossiped incessantly about us, taken our husband or our wives, or murdered us, cheated on us, stolen from us! We deserve to be haters! And, actually, we probably do deserve revenge if those things have come our way. I don't know if I can say I've ever wanted burning coals to fall from heaven and burn up someone who treated me wrong. Didn't really want to see them smoldering in a smoky pit like a pig on the beach in Hawaii. But I have harbored resentment. That imprisons, too. Me and the offender. And the whole idea of God's vengeance being speedy is a thing I've never seen. I've definitely seen it be sure, though. In time. Not my time. His. But when the shoe is on the other foot and it is I who have gotten on the wrong side of God's rightness, I want Him to slow down the flying coals until I can repent.

More than once, recently, I have been deeply hurt by the actions of others. I think if I told you the stories from my viewpoint, you'd agree that what happened was at least unfair, if not disgusting. As one who is unafraid of confrontation, it has been my plot of late to say nothing. Commanded by my Father to keep my mouth closed. Hard enough when things are going well, but now...sheesh! I have lain awake at night discussing these things with the phantoms of my mind, setting the stage where I confront and talk. And it always comes back to: There's nothing you can say or do that will change an outcome that is already an outcome. Except to love the others involved.

So I'm in church a while back and praising God with all my heart. I can say unequivocally, praising God is one of the delights of my life! Hands raised, eyes closed, seeing in my spirit the very throne room where unapproachable light beckons me in. There, in His Presence, on that Sunday, my God asked me a question: "What would Hannah (not her name) think if she saw you right now, praising Me? Would she think you genuine?" Way to ruin the mood...I had to think about it for a few minutes, because I hadn't done anything wrong. In fact, I'd handled it all very well. But my heart wasn't right. Though outwardly I'd done just fine, and that's important to my Father, inwardly I knew Hannah and I weren't right. And it was obvious from how our incident had come down that Hannah wasn't really capable of making it right all by herself.

Of course, then there's the sermon by a visiting preacher who shows a comic strip character on the overhead. The character, a kid, is challenged by his big cat alter-ego to seek forgiveness from a neighbor kid he'd wronged. The kid sat in silence for a frame, a quizzical look on his face. The last frame shows a resolved child saying, "Nope! There's got to be another way." And that is what I knew Hannah thought. And God told me to make it right from my side. I, who had not made it wrong to begin with. But I kept seeing me before Him, hands up, heart open, and I didn't want anything in the world to get in the way of that flow. Offense isn't worth it. So I bought her a gift. Said let's just start over. And I wasn't trying to heap coals of fire upon her head. I just wanted to please my Father, Who, I think, is her Father, too. I leave the rest up to Him. With the other tests of my integrity, too. Some things, as my friend Marilyn says, are ONLY GOD things. What I can do to live in peace, I should do, even if it looks like I'm eating crow. God sees it in an entirely different light.

As for ISIS and the horrible evil of our day, there is a holocaust coming that will scorch the whole earth with holy fire. Unrequited, unavenged deaths through the ages will end in a fire that burns eternally for those who reject God. School shootings, serial murders, rape...on and on it goes and the end doesn't seem as speedy as we hope. Pastor Saeed Abedini languishes in a prison in Iran, jailed for helping orphaned children in that country. Beaten and abused, Abedini is in his third year of imprisonment. In a letter to his eight-year-old daughter, Rebekka Grace, Pastor Abedini summed up his suffering this way:

"Jesus allows me to be kept here for His glory. I know that you question why you have prayed so many times for my return and yet I am not home yet. Now there is a big WHY in your mind you are asking: WHY Jesus isn't answering your prayers and the prayers of all of the people around the world praying for my release and for me to be home with you and our family.The answer to the WHY is WHO. WHO is control? LORD JESUS CHRIST is in control."

Life isn't fair. In our desire to right the wrongs and injustices against us, we need to be very careful that we don't find ourselves on the wrong side of the will of God, Who, as Pastor Abedini says, knows everything, including how He will right all wrongs. The cross of Jesus is the most unfair and inhumane execution perhaps the world has ever seen. God Himself, The Word Who fashioned the very hands that nailed Him to the cross, allowed gross injustice in order to bring about a prodigious righteousness that saves those who believe from every miry pit, every smoky dungeon, every hellish death we all deserve! Nothing I face will ever by that unfair. I can trust a heart that big to avenge wrongs done against me, but more importantly, I can trust He will help me to be salt and light so that those who have hurt me see Him instead.
 

Friday, October 10, 2014

PSALM 140 - Closet Wars

O Lord, my Lord, the strength of my salvation, You have covered my head in the day of battle. Grant not, O Lord, the desires of the wicked; do not further their evil plot, or they will be exalted.   (Verses 7-8)

Finally, be strong in the Lord and the strength of His might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle with flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in high places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace. In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God.    Ephesians 6   Italics, mine

I know what it's like to fight with the enemy! I propose there are four things we Christians tend to do in battle. Stand and fight. Play dead. Run and hide. Die. As in any war, training sure helps. Drilling. Marching. Disciplining our bodies in readiness for the day when the enemy appears. Learning to be focused. I watched the Band of Brothers series recently and was struck by the thought: How did anyone survive that war? Running into enemy fire with their rifles out, dodging grenades and mortars from tanks. The battlefields were afterward strewn with bodies of the dead from both sides of the conflict.

We Christians wake up to war every day. It's the hope of our enemy that we don't know it...or think about it. So off we go without our armor, forgetful of our training, one shoe on and one shoe off...oops, no helmet. Is it any wonder we get obliterated? And much of the time we don't know what hit us.

I was engaged in the battle of my life a few years back. A captive behind enemy lines for a while, I was relearning and retraining for this constant battle in which we exist as Christians. I had a prayer closet in my house. Dark and safe with the coats that hung unused in the southern California climate touching me with their edges and the many boxes stored around the baseboards of the closet closing me in in a cocoon of sorts. There I fought my way back to life. Every day. All authority in heaven and earth has been given to Christ and He has given it to me, so Satan, I tell you, in the name of Jesus Christ, by the power of the Holy Spirit and in the presence of the God of All, my Father, no weapon formed against me will prosper. Here, I literally took up a phantom sword in my right hand and lifted a phantom shield in my left. Covered my heart with the shield and pointed the sword toward the enemy. Crazy, maybe. Effective. Yep. You have been stripped of all your authority at the cross of Christ and you have none over me. So I command you to be gone, to stay completely away from my path and to shut up! Always, always...I actually felt the enemy back off. Some days it took a bit longer with me articulating things thrown at me from him, but always Christ in me was larger than the blackness of the battle. I still do this to this day.

One morning right after my closet wars, my phone rang. It was a friend who knew my struggles and made them hers. It was Marlana. "What have you been doing?" she asked. "Praying." My response. "I've been praying for you," she went on, "and...I see you...well, what is that you have in your hand? When I was praying I saw you with your hand straight out in front of you...like you were holding something."

Marlana lived in another state. Couldn't see me in my closet physically. No one could.

"It's my sword." She knew what I meant.

"Oh...makes sense now," she replied.

I wasn't in my battle alone. Only God could have my friend praying for me as I fought against the enemy. Only God could have opened up my battlefield to her. Had her come along side me even though she wasn't physically present. My war buddy. Dodging bullets with me in this literal war we fight. An interesting fact about us. I introduced Marlana to Jesus when I was a twenty-one-year-old high school teacher and she was a freshman. I taught her the Word of God and was given the privilege of training her up. And when my conflict was too heavy for me to bear alone, she was there to help me deflect the barrage of artillery.

God is the strength of my every battle. In fact, the battle is really His (2 Chronicles 20). And He's won it. The final outcome is set. He does, however, want us armed and ready to stand in the day...not play dead, actually be overcome and die or run and hide. Stand. Be ready. And cover your most vulnerable parts, head and heart, with your sure salvation and with the Word of God. "Do not be afraid, and do not be dismayed at this great horde," said our God. "Stand firm and hold your position, and see the salvation of the Lord on your behalf!" ( 2 Chronicles 20)

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

PSALM 140 - Trick or Treat in Reverse

Guard me, O Lord, from the hands of the wicked; preserve me from violent men, who have planned to trip up my feet. The arrogant have hidden a trap for me, and with cords, they have spread a net. Beside the way, they have set snares for me. I say to the Lord, You are my God. Give ear to the voice of my pleas for mercy, O Lord!  (Verses 4-6)

So brothers and sisters, be careful that none of you has an evil, unbelieving heart that will turn you away from the living God. But encourage each other every day while it is "today." Help each other so none of you will become hardened because sin has tricked you.   Hebrews 3

It's kind of like "trick or treat" in reverse when it comes to our enemy. He knocks on the door, offering up lots and lots of candy and we eat like little fiends from his sugary bounty before we realize we will pay a huge price for the indulgence. We have sold our souls and lie holding our stomachs with a cold rag on our heads as he carries us into captivity. He's looking for us--the enemy. Waiting for just the right, vulnerable moment to trick us into the trap he's set. It's age-old. His ploys don't change much. Booze. Sex. Drugs. Power. Money. And Satan tries to get us on either end of the spectrum: pain or prosperity.

I don't think our hearts have to be necessarily evil to be unbelieving. That was the trap in the very beginning. Believing the lie of the enemy that God isn't good. That He isn't interested in our best interest. That something else or someone else will really make us feel better. It makes us cynical. If we knew there was going to be a robber waiting at some point in the day to attack us at work, the grocery store or at school, wouldn't we be ready? At least have pepper spray. Or even avoid the place altogether? Our enemy "prowls around like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour (1 Peter 5)." That should be pretty obvious, but he hides in places we often least expect.

I think sin is a politically incorrect word nowadays. Morality to the world has some very blurred lines. Biblical wrong has been legislated to be "right." So what am I talking about when I say "sin"? Anything we take up that becomes more important than our relationship with God. Idolatry traps us. Call it whatever you want, but if it's bigger than pleasing the one true God, it's, to you, sin. And the longer and more completely we bow down to and embrace our "sin," the more cynical about a merciful God we become. It's only logical. Idolatry captivates the mind and fetters the soul. That thing that is all we live for, all we can think about. Whatever drives us. Fulfills us. We are ever chained to it without God's mercy, which we are loath to call on in our prostration before our sin. And often we blame God for the mess we are in!

I love the example of the monkey in the jungle. Trappers don't even need a difficult contraption to capture monkeys. All they need is a bright, shining object which they place within the cage. As the sunlight catches its rays seeping through the bars of the cage, the monkey approaches in curiosity. The little creature looks around. Then back at the shining object. Captivated. Charmed by the brightness. Without much more thought than that, in goes the monkey's hand. It grasped the shining object. It will be mine! When the monkey attempts to retrieve his prize, he discovers he can't get his hand out of the cage. It's hopelessly stuck! Trapped! Outside the cage! By his own idolatry. Because...the monkey won't let go.

I've been trapped, monkey that I was. Tricked by an idol that left me more bereft than the pain that had me grasping for a panacea. Cynicism followed as I held onto the idol and blamed God for my pain. But there comes a time, when you've known the precious love of God, that the idol makes you sick, literally and/or physically. It drops hollow into the vacuum your soul has become. Unsatisfying. Tarnished and abused. Snared by the wayside, I cried for mercy from the God I had abandoned. Pled for help that it would even be possible to let go of my shining object. My Father peeled my fingers, one at a time, from my grasp, and took my hand, now free, into His. I just took a very deep breath here at the computer. It's good to be a child in the house of God.



 

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

PSALM 140 - The Wild Animal In Cage

Deliver me, O Lord, from evil men; preserve me from violent men, who plan evil things in their heart and stir up wars continually. They make their tongue sharp as a serpent's, and under their lips is the venom of asps.  (Verses 1-3)

For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God.  James 3

The family living in the townhouse behind us just moved out this weekend. They were leasing, but had been there for as long as we've owned our place. It's quiet back there now in the home across the driveway. Gone are the chattering of two little girls and the smoke wafting into our house when the chain smoking mom puffed on her patio. Gone, also, is the screaming. Berating of children using some of the foulest language imaginable. It got so bad one night that Vanessa called the police. Wrote the dad a note the next day and left it in the mailbox. "You're destroying your children." It's not just that he cursed at them. He told them who they are. I have to say nicely what their dad said in the most vulgar terms. They were useless. Worthless. Stupid. His demands were always laced with invectives. But they came to neighborhood block parties like they were the "Leave it to Beaver" family.

I taught high school for several years so I know what that looks like when a kid is growing up. And it's not pretty. What you've been told about yourself by the parents who raise you will take its toll. There is the young woman with chronic stomach problems, headaches and breathing issues. Smart. Capable. Always saying, "I'm sorry." When she's done nothing wrong. Doctors could find no diagnosis, but when she went to counseling, she discovered the physical manifestations were rooted in the prison she felt herself to be in. The fence of her incarceration thrown up by the words of her father. The boy who acts out for attention so he's always in detention. His mother always told him he was good for nothing. He plays that role pretty well. I've heard a father scream at his young son, "No one will ever like you!" And I know of a young woman who, in her twenties, is still working through her father telling her that "No one will ever marry you!" She's married. And very loved. But extremely insecure about who might find her valuable. An adult friend was so riddled by her mother's fierceness that it took several months in lock-up in a mental facility for her to come to grips with her own dissociative behavior. Venom of the asp, lurking beneath the tongue, is deadly. We don't have to go further than the nearest newspaper to see the latest suicide of a teen who could no longer take the beatings delivered by other teens whose tongues played out their restless evil. We don't have to hit someone to abuse them.

If, as Jesus said in Matthew 12, "Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks," there is something frightfully wrong and evil with someone constantly killing with their words. They've been thinking mean things before they say them. Ruminating on what is unpleasant, at least, and evil, at worst. Jesus compared it to a good tree and a bad tree, which makes sense. A good tree, with healthy sap and deep roots, produces a crop of good fruit. A bad tree, with shallow roots perhaps planted in iffy soil, produces shriveled inedible fruit. But fruit indeed. That's why He goes on to say that "by your words you will be justified and by your words you will be condemned." Not that your words are anything, but your heart is the dictionary you use to form your sentences. If it's rotten...well.

"No one's righteous, no not one; no one understands; no one seeks after God. All have turned aside; together they have become worthless. No one does good. Not even one." King Solomon's assessment in Ecclesiastes. That's our dilemma. God knew it. Had to fix it. Then the soldiers of the governor took Jesus into the governor's headquarters, and they gathered the whole battalion before Him. They stripped Him and put a scarlet robe on Him, and twisting a crown of thorns, they put it on His head and put a reed in His right hand. And kneeling before Him, they mocked Him, saying, "Hail, King of the Jews!" And they spit on Him and took the reed and struck Him on the head. And when they had mocked Him, they stripped Him of the robe, and put His own clothes on Him and led Him away to be crucified (Matthew 27).  Italics, mine

Jesus was in court because liars had been paid to be witnesses for the prosecution. The tongues of the religious elite wagged in jealousy and self-righteousness the entire time Jesus was healing the sick, raising the dead, and freeing the demon possessed. Evil speech was what put Jesus on the cross. Evil taunts still darting through the air as He hung dying there. But Jesus knew He had to fix the heart. No way to stop the deadly curse of the venomous tongue unless God could change the source of its evil.

Those of us indwelt by the Holy Spirit have a choice now. The more we soak in God's Word and marinate in His love, the more our tongue should be tamed. To not speak evil. To not incarcerate our children and loved ones in a hurtful jail from which it will take years to extricate themselves. Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things (Philippians 4). We live with a wild animal. We must tame it.
 

Monday, October 6, 2014

PSALM 139 - Assisted Suicide

Oh that You would slay the wicked, O God! O men of blood, depart from me! They speak against You with malicious intent. Your enemies take Your name in vain! Do I not hate those who hate You, Lord? And do I not loathe those who rise up against You? I hate them with complete hatred; I count them my enemies. Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way.   (Verses 19-24)    Italics, mine

The morning news these days is filled with beheadings, atrocities committed on women and children, mass killings of Christians, even the violent butchering of an Oklahoma woman doing her job in human resources on a normal day. There is evil in this world. A young college coed goes missing. A realtor murdered and buried in a shallow grave because she went to show a vacant home. Wickedness surprises us. Catches us off guard. And makes something rise up in us that cries for justice! David's plea here is our plea, too. We hate evil! We want those perpetrating it to be caught and brought to justice! The enemies of our God become our enemies. Evil running rampant is not His will for His earth.

But David takes it deeper. What if there's some evil in me? Something I'm doing that grieves God?Wow. That's a great question. We often don't know our own hearts. I had a dream last night. It was so vivid it awakened me. I was sitting on a bench with my daughter, Heather, when a young woman came to sit with us. Our perch was at the edge of a deep ravine with a few straggly trees growing unsteadily on the edge of the cliff it created. The woman had dark blond hair pulled loosely back in a long ponytail with strands of it falling into her pretty face. Her eyes were crystal blue and sad. As often happens to me in real life, the girl began telling me her story without my prompting her. How she was going to run away with a fifty-two year old man because her life was confusing and she was hurting. She was thirty-two. I know because I asked her.

"Is he good to you?" I asked.

"Well, most of the time," she responded, glancing away and looking at the rocky ground beneath our feet.

"Most of the time?" An alarm went off in me. "What does that mean?"

"Oh, sometimes he yells; sometimes he hits me." Tears sparkled in her eyes as she said this, daring to look into my eyes.  "But..." And she shrugged her shoulders.

"You can't go away with him!" I was adamant. Preached, as I recall, a pretty good sermon about abuse. What abusers do. How this man followed the pattern. Watched as she deflated. This, her one hope of a future. And I am deconstructing it bit by bit.

She began to cry. Got up and walked over to the edge of the ravine and began climbing a tree while talking to the girls sitting under it. "No one was there for me," she's telling them. Nonchalant now. Not crying anymore. "Not one of my friends helped." The girls looked up at her, saying nothing, wondering, I knew in my dream, why she's telling them all this. Then the young woman jumped! Flew out of the tree. To her certain death.

My heart stopped. I hadn't even thought of her doing that! Heather looked at me as if to say, "Mom, I wish you hadn't stolen her hope." It wasn't judgment in the dream. It was the truth. I'd listened and given my opinion, but I'd not said a thing about Jesus. About His love. About how He is enough. I'd only told the desperate young woman what not to do. I had assisted in her suicide. AND I had grieved the Holy Spirit within me.

There was no beheading or violent murder. Just judgment in my heart. Deadly anyway. Surely this is what David meant. "Search me and know my heart." What's hidden there that's as repulsive to my Father as the evil so obvious in others. If God hates it, I want to hate it and eradicate it, too! Not just in others, but also in myself! For children of God, the standard is high. We deal with pride, judgment, greed, covetousness or subliminal idolatry that the world wouldn't necessarily observe or deem actual evil. But it still grieves God to see it there, possibly festering beneath the surface. O God, don't let me get away with anything that breaks Your heart! My prayer. Because I know I'm so imperfect. Prone to wander. Easily tricked by Satan. I need the Lord to monitor my heart and soul, wide open for Him to see.

I can't tell you in the moment when the girl jumped to her death, springing off the tree limb in one last hopeless gesture, how sick I felt. "No!" I screamed it! As she plunged into eternity, I cried. Knowing there is hope in Jesus. Knowing He would love her well. Never hurt her. Never abuse her. And I forgot to tell her. Was too busy waxing eloquent on what she needed to do. And when I awoke, I prayed in the real world for a heart free of condemnation, open to the heartache of others, overflowing with the Jesus she so desperately needed. O, Jesus, "Lead me in the everlasting way."





 

Friday, October 3, 2014

PSALM 139 - Penny For Your Thoughts...

How precious to me are Your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them. If I could count them, they are more than the sand. I awake, and I am still with You.  (Verses 17-18)

"When the Spirit of Truth comes, He will guide you into all the truth, for He will not speak on His own authority, but whatever He hears He will speak, and He will declare to you the things that are to come."    Jesus      John 16

Who has known the mind of the Lord? Who has been able to teach Him? But we have the mind of Christ.  1 Corinthians 2:16      Italics, mine

I'm pretty much a "penny for your thoughts" kind of person. Always wondering what someone else is thinking. I've made mistakes in relationships before assuming someone thought one way when actually I was completely wrong. I've actually had sleepless nights assuming. So how did David praise God for all of His thoughts? How in the world did he even know what God is thinking?

There are at least two ways, according to God's Word. The Bible. The Holy Spirit. The Word of God is alive and active (Hebrews 4:12). A living organism that speaks truth to us as a group and as individuals. It's why Jesus used the Word of God against Satan in His wilderness temptation. Jesus is the Logos of God Who spoke the world in to being, spoke the Bible to those who penned it and speaks through it today to those who read it. Logos relates to the entire inspired word of God.

Within that larger, all encompassing Word, are rhemas. Passages that the Holy Spirit brings to our attention because they apply to a specific current need or circumstance for which He gives comfort, rebuke or direction. It's God speaking to a person from His own Word to tell that person what He's thinking about what's happening to her in the moment. A miracle, really.

I was involved in a thing that wasn't pleasing to God some years ago. I knew it was iffy. I struggled with the right and wrong of it. Daily I had my Bible open before me, praying. On a particular morning, I remember specifically asking God, "What's wrong with me?" I was in the book of Hosea at the time. Reading through. And this verse hit me right in the heart. "Israel has become like a pigeon--easily fooled and stupid." A direct blunt answer to my question. It stopped me cold. I was being stupid. And I knew it. The voice of God confirmed it by a rhema that cut right through to the issue. My Father, talking to me through a specific word. His thoughts on the subject of "me." Millions of people all over the earth may have read that same passage that day and just skipped over it. My God wouldn't let me.

We also know God's thoughts because as Christians His Spirit lives in us. The promise in John 16 is that Jesus will tell the Holy Spirit what to say to us--what the Father in their communications has revealed. He promised (John 10) we'd hear His voice. And that's how we know His thoughts--what's on His mind. And I don't mean like some pastor leaving his church because "God told him to." Specific direction from Christ isn't going to contradict the Word of God. The evening Bible study when I heard the voice of God telling me that we were to pray for the young barren woman sobbing over her inability to have children, I knew praying for her would be in God's general will. But Jesus pointed to Jennifer specifically and said, "Pray for her now." His answer: Not one, but two children! I'm glad we listened that night to the Spirit of God.

Why, then, wouldn't the thoughts of God be the most precious thoughts of all to us? The Creator and Sustainer of everything everywhere is ready to let me know what's on His mind! It's at my fingertips when I page through the Bible. It's in my soul as He speaks comfort, direction, peace, guidance and solace to me, personally, Kay Farish. If you could, wouldn't you want to know the every thought of God? Of course they are too numerous and way too high for us to conceive of all of them, but He stooped (Psalm 18) to Earth to express them Himself! Teaching us. Touching us in the moment when Jesus drove away demons, diseases and dead works!

With David, I rejoice that every day I still have the Holy Spirit in me. When I wake up, He hasn't slipped away from me in the middle of the night. The Great Counselor (Isaiah 9:16), Who never sleeps, is fresh and ready to guide me through the day. To walk with me and talk with me as my constant guide and companion. Jesus wants me to know what He's thinking.The privilege is mine, as a child of God, to access His thoughts and make them mine.

Thursday, October 2, 2014

PSALM 139 - What God Thinks About Abortion

For You formed my inward parts; You knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully set apart. Wonderful are Your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from You, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in Your book were written every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.   (Verses 13-16)

We waited five years after we were married to have children. It was a thing with Bill, my husband. I was only twenty when we married, and he, a much older twenty-four. I've always wanted children. Was an expert mother to the many dolls of my early years, dressing them, washing them, cutting their hair (which was not the best idea when Mother caught me mid-perm on my Madame Alexander doll). The five years between marriage and children was a bit of a struggle for me, though I did finish college, teach junior high and high school, and travel to Europe during that time. As is my wont, however, I wasn't terrifically silent about my desires in those years and more especially as the end of Bill's self-imposed five years approached. Submissive, yes. Quiet, no. "What do you think about starting our family now?" Every few months or so. "Not yet." And so it went until one magic day when Bill said, "How about now?"

I didn't know the day or hour of my conception. It happened in the darkness of my womb. Life beginning with the joining of sperm and egg. All the DNA of Heather, our first, already set to create the woman I know today as my oldest child. Her perfectly shaped lips, her gorgeous long legs, her love of tradition and her big blue eyes. Everything already in motion before I knew she was even there. And this is how I knew:

Bill and I had to move his aunt from one apartment to another on a cool November day in 1973. Her husband was ill and the extended family came to make the move as quickly as possible. There was much bustling that morning as we walked clothing items, kitchen utensils, pots and pans and furniture from one place to another. Not much contemplative time. That's why it was such an unusual day for God to stop me in my tracks. I don't know why I was alone on the sidewalk, but I was. Just me, the cool air and the warm sun, as I walked back for what seemed the hundredth time to his aunt's place. Then I heard it. "Daughter, remember November the ninth because there is life within you." I was absolutely stunned. I looked around. Thinking someone was standing there. The voice seemed really loud to me. So real it couldn't just be in my head. But...there was no one on the sidewalk but me. And I could see Bill in the distance hurrying my way. I went a little limp. Not as in fainting limp, but as in I just heard God limp. Trembling a bit from the voice and the message. I was pregnant and it didn't take an early pregnancy test for me to know it. Bill was like, "We'll see.." But I knew. Heather came on my twenty-sixth birthday exactly nine months later. In fact, my dear friend, Barbara, fascinated by the encounter with God, predicted the day because it would've been the exact gestation period from date to date.

My point? The same as David's in this psalm. We matter. Our matter matters. In the darkest most private regions of our existence God hovers over cells as they multiply because there is a child being completed...not a fetus (which, by the way, is defined as "a baby"), a blob of cells, an inconvenience or an extension of the mother's body. A person develops in the darkness, where it should be safe. Where God is designing, knitting together a unique individual who is not like any other person ever created. No two fingerprints are alike. You'd think God would run out of designs, wouldn't you? Like Cabbage Patch Kids, we all come with a story. Already written with the pen of a God intimately involved in its playing out on Earth. Each of us set apart for a thing only we can do.

So how does God feel about abortion? The suctioning from the secret place of utmost safety and ultimate creativity of the child who bears potential beyond our imagining? The snipping of the back of the neck of a near term or full term child because the mother decides somehow in the eighth or ninth month that for some reason she isn't really into being a mother right now? God feels that is murder, because believes He's creating a person. It's pretty obvious that abortion is the taking of a life. But mothers have been convinced that the child is a part of their own body. Like a tumor would be. Attached to the wall of her womb. Not a child clinging by a life-rope to another's body for safety and sustenance.

This isn't a tirade. God's love is bigger than our hurtful choices and our careless youthful dalliances. Because of Christ, there is forgiveness available for even this. But it is an intimate look at how God feels about the babies in our bodies. He loves them, writes about them...sees them there not impassively as the casual observer, but as His own unique creations. They were not destined for the trash cans of the world. God isn't politically correct enough to care about the changing mores and semantics that have allowed us to fall for the propaganda mills that tell us it's not a kid, after all. Though their little spirits are with Him now, I fear God's justice will one day deal with the injustice of the deaths of His most vulnerable creations.

"I feel the greatest destroyer of peace today is 'Abortion', because it is war against the child...a direct killing of the innocent child, 'Murder' by the mother herself...and if we can accept that a mother can kill even her own child, how can we tell other people not to kill one another? How do we persuade a woman not to have an abortion? As always we must persuade with love...and we remind ourselves that love means to be willing to give until it hurts..."      Mother Teresa

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

PSALM 139 - Scared of the Dark?

If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there Your hand shall lead me, and Your right hand shall hold me.  If I say, "Surely the darkness shall cover me, and the light about me be night," even the darkness is not dark to You; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with You.   (Verses 9-12)

You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father Who is in heaven.  Jesus, Matthew 5

There are creatures in the depths of the ocean that we only suppose to be in existence. Only recently have scientists plumbed the ocean depths to discover giant squid in their natural habitat. But, there is an even larger breed, the colossal squid, that has only recently been discovered because one washed up onto shore in 2007 in New Zealand. It weighed a thousand pounds. Giant squid are a long as whales and are prey for them. However, sometimes squid win as proven by the sucker and bite marks on the body of the dead whale. But the oceans are so deep, there hasn't been an opportunity to actually see the wars going on between these enormous creatures.

There is a volcano named Titanic that whose base is 12,000 feet below the surface of the North Atlantic. A more newly discovered volcano under the sea is called Kick'em Jenny. The conditions surrounding it are too dangerous for humans, so the efforts to understand its power were photographed by a roving vehicle. What the scientists discovered while probing the depths around the volcano is that there is life there...a place on the planet where it was supposed that life didn't exist.

Our galaxy is unfathomably large. Our sun, the nearest star to Earth, is 93 million miles away. It's a million times larger than our planet. These are just one small part of the Milky Way. It's so large that even traveling at the speed of light, it would take 100,000 years to travel across it. Beyond our galaxy is a vast expanse of other galaxies, probably billions of them! We don't even know how big the universe is. The most distant galaxy known to date is Abell2744Y1, and it was formed 13.2 billion years ago. Mind blowing even comprehending fully the immensity of the heavens into which we look each night. Even more awe inspiring is the fact that it's all expanding, as from an earlier explosion. So there are reaches of the heaven into which the universe can expand further!

All of this is visible to the naked eye of our God. The creatures we aren't even aware of lurking and living at the bottom of a volcano rumbling deep beneath the ocean. Another entire world existing in darkness. Were I to go there, my God would not lose me. It's not too dark in the waters of the seas for our God to be blind to our existence. And we don't have to be floating in oblivion 12,000 feet deep. We can be carried along in darkness right here on solid ground, too. Unable to see our way. Plunged into sudden sickness, financial reversals, abandonment or even death. Laid low with little light for the clarity of our circumstances. God isn't looking at us through His holy sunglasses, trying to find us in our pain. Our God is there with us. We can't be in a place where He doesn't bring the light. Just as He created and sustains the depths we cannot fathom, God blew up a few molecules of life into the universe and made a sparkling array of brilliance that ever reaches outward toward what seems to be an infinite amount of  space. No matter how far it expands, God can see the end of it. And the beginning. All at the same time. So if I fly on the wings of the morning to experience life on the lam, I can't possibly get away from my God. God's x-ray vision pierces the most profound darkness. Makes it look like daytime. He certainly gets what seems most dark to us.

"I am the Light of the World," Jesus said. "Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the Light of life." Heaven is lit with His effulgent light (Revelation 22:5). There is no blackness or confusion in His presence. If darkness is light to Jesus, then we can be assured of His clarity and purpose when we walk in the glow of that Light. Following Jesus means that instead of our footfall in His shadow, our paths are illuminated by the sheen from His being. As Christians, we are filled with the Spirit, alit from within. More and more as we know our God. It's dark out there in our world right now. Ebony clouds shrouding entire countries with tyranny and hopelessness. We are called to be light. To shine in the night that creeps across our planet. We are a reflection of the glory emanating from the true Light as we trust the fact that there isn't a place too dark or too far for His hand to reach us.