I said, "I will guard my ways so that I may not sin with my tongue. I will guard my mouth with a muzzle as long as the wicked are in my presence."
I was speechless and quiet. I kept silent, even from speaking good. And my pain intensified. My heart grew hot within me; as I mused, a fire burned. (vs. 1-3)
What was it David was afraid he might say? What was it that he wanted to talk to God about but that the wicked around him could not stand to hear?
Things do not always go the way we hoped. Life sometimes falls apart around us and we have no explanation for it. Except maybe our expectations were not met. Elijah stands one moment on Mt. Carmel calling down fire from heaven to consume not only the sacrifices he put there but also the prophets of Baal. Elijah - my God is Yah - powerful in the ministry of bringing Israel back to the one true God. But while the smoke of the burning priests and the charred sacrifice were still hanging heavy in the air, Jezebel promises to kill Elijah by sundown the next day. And Elijah runs away. Hides and wants to die. Thinks he is the only one serving God. Why was he so disappointed? Why so depressed? I think it was because he expected the big show to once and for all exhibit so powerfully the preeminence of Yahweh that the people would bow before their God in deep repentance. Then Elijah would know he had fulfilled God's call on his life! Bam! Pow! God shows up in fury, licks up fire and priests, and leaves a scar on the mountainside as a remembrance of His omnipotence. And even that was not enough.
Failed calling. Take me home, Lord. I am the only one who understands You. Who wants to know You. Thank God Elijah does not say these things on the mountain in the presence of the wicked. They are words only for our God with Whom we have relationship. But Elijah is fuming. Like Jonah did. At the counterintuitive nature of his God. What should have been the end result was merely signaling the end of Elijah!
"What are you doing here?" God wants an answer from His boy.
"I've done everything You asked....been so zealous for you! It doesn't do any good! I am the only one out here trying, and now they want to kill me!"
Wind, earthquake and fire shatter the cave that has become Elijah's temporary home! God was not in them. The weird weather settles. Silence pervades the rock dwelling as Elijah awaits the next great storm. A whisper floats on the air. The Bible doesn't say what God whispered, but Elijah knows the voice of his God and slowly comes to the entrance of the cave, face covered against the glory of Yahweh.
"What are you doing here?" God asks the same question.
Elijah. Same answer. He didn't get it.
Elijah was disappointed that God didn't bring about the repentance of the Israelites with the might of His hand. God was disappointed that Elijah did not understand that His still small voice - His whisper - is enough to change everything. Elijah was done after that. Effectively. Ultimately the mantle of his ministry taken up by Elisha. The last time Elijah is mentioned in the Bible is when he is taken up by God into the clouds. Ironically, in a chariot of fire in a whirlwind. He got his show. A loving God giving Elijah the theatrics he wanted.
You would think that Elijah would have stood his ground with Jezebel. Raised his hands to heaven and said, "I don't fear anyone but God, Jezzie! Do your worst!" On the other hand, Elijah did not scream to the winds in front of doubters and unbelievers how disappointed he was in God. He saved that for God. Who can take it. Who understands it. Who doesn't want it bottled up inside of us until it explodes like a burst appendix, spewing poison onto the rest of the body.
In our fuming and festering over our broken hearts and lost destinies, hear God say, "What are you doing?" Talk to me.
I was speechless and quiet. I kept silent, even from speaking good. And my pain intensified. My heart grew hot within me; as I mused, a fire burned. (vs. 1-3)
What was it David was afraid he might say? What was it that he wanted to talk to God about but that the wicked around him could not stand to hear?
Things do not always go the way we hoped. Life sometimes falls apart around us and we have no explanation for it. Except maybe our expectations were not met. Elijah stands one moment on Mt. Carmel calling down fire from heaven to consume not only the sacrifices he put there but also the prophets of Baal. Elijah - my God is Yah - powerful in the ministry of bringing Israel back to the one true God. But while the smoke of the burning priests and the charred sacrifice were still hanging heavy in the air, Jezebel promises to kill Elijah by sundown the next day. And Elijah runs away. Hides and wants to die. Thinks he is the only one serving God. Why was he so disappointed? Why so depressed? I think it was because he expected the big show to once and for all exhibit so powerfully the preeminence of Yahweh that the people would bow before their God in deep repentance. Then Elijah would know he had fulfilled God's call on his life! Bam! Pow! God shows up in fury, licks up fire and priests, and leaves a scar on the mountainside as a remembrance of His omnipotence. And even that was not enough.
Failed calling. Take me home, Lord. I am the only one who understands You. Who wants to know You. Thank God Elijah does not say these things on the mountain in the presence of the wicked. They are words only for our God with Whom we have relationship. But Elijah is fuming. Like Jonah did. At the counterintuitive nature of his God. What should have been the end result was merely signaling the end of Elijah!
"What are you doing here?" God wants an answer from His boy.
"I've done everything You asked....been so zealous for you! It doesn't do any good! I am the only one out here trying, and now they want to kill me!"
Wind, earthquake and fire shatter the cave that has become Elijah's temporary home! God was not in them. The weird weather settles. Silence pervades the rock dwelling as Elijah awaits the next great storm. A whisper floats on the air. The Bible doesn't say what God whispered, but Elijah knows the voice of his God and slowly comes to the entrance of the cave, face covered against the glory of Yahweh.
"What are you doing here?" God asks the same question.
Elijah. Same answer. He didn't get it.
Elijah was disappointed that God didn't bring about the repentance of the Israelites with the might of His hand. God was disappointed that Elijah did not understand that His still small voice - His whisper - is enough to change everything. Elijah was done after that. Effectively. Ultimately the mantle of his ministry taken up by Elisha. The last time Elijah is mentioned in the Bible is when he is taken up by God into the clouds. Ironically, in a chariot of fire in a whirlwind. He got his show. A loving God giving Elijah the theatrics he wanted.
You would think that Elijah would have stood his ground with Jezebel. Raised his hands to heaven and said, "I don't fear anyone but God, Jezzie! Do your worst!" On the other hand, Elijah did not scream to the winds in front of doubters and unbelievers how disappointed he was in God. He saved that for God. Who can take it. Who understands it. Who doesn't want it bottled up inside of us until it explodes like a burst appendix, spewing poison onto the rest of the body.
In our fuming and festering over our broken hearts and lost destinies, hear God say, "What are you doing?" Talk to me.
No comments:
Post a Comment