Lord, my Rock, I call out to You for help. Do not be deaf to me. If You are silent, I will be like those who are in the grave. Hear the sound of my prayer when I cry out to You for help. I raise my hands to Your Most Holy Place. (vs.1-2)
I had a health scare last week. Found a lump. Every woman's worst fear. That tingling in my stomach where fear squeezes it tight. I knew I had to get my thinking straight so that the enemy's words would not become my own. I also knew I had to get to the doctor. During the week of waiting to see her, I struggled with fear over faith. What if I do have breast cancer? How does one who knows her Savior react? This one falls on her face before Him. I have had two of my best friends go home after having struggled through the ravages of this disease. I have another who is still vibrant and very much alive....Praise our Father!!!!!
Friday was the day of my appointment. Thursday I had to battle the voice of doom all day. Knowing my Father will take care of me in the deepest part of my heart. Friday morning I was face down calling out to the Lord, my Rock. Here is one of the things I love most about the Lord. He is listening to me. I knew it without question. As I cried out for mercy in this situation, I knew He had His hand on my head. And, trust me, just like you, I know what it is like to be in a one-way conversation when the other person has checked out. Is listening to me about as intently as a dead person. But the presence of my Father was palpable.
I had written in my Friday "Psalm Calm" about "seeing God's glory in the land of the living." Right before I went into my appointment for the check-up and mammogram, I received a text from my daughter, Vanessa. She had been praying over me that morning. Her continual prayer was that I would see God's glory in the land of the living. Said it just became her mantra. Then she read the daily "Psalm Calm." I knew my God had heard me. He just wanted to confirm that to me. Isn't He sweet? Who is sweeter than our Father?
At that point all I knew was that He had heard. The rest was up to Him. I belong to Him. Therefore, my blood pressure checked out normal...no panic attack. Assurance only that I had been heard. As the doctor put her hands on the lump in my breast, I felt like I was in front of a firing squad. Would they shoot or allow me to live?
"Hmmm," she mused. "I don't know what that is. But I am not too worried about it. Had a mammo lately?"
On to the X-ray tech. Waited an hour to get in, though I had an appointment. Stretching out the time. Learning patience. Hoping with my gynecologist that it was just a blob of fat or something. Mammogram is clear. On to ultra sound tech. Chatty. And I just want to know what she sees. Nothing. Then the doctor comes to check me manually again. Though she feels what I feel, she thinks it is nothing to worry about. Breast tissue. Pats my back. Sends me home.
I am still breathless with thanksgiving. My death sentence postponed. Raised to new life. Grateful beyond words because I know so many women will not get that news today, and did not on Friday.
I raise my hands to Your Most Holy Place. My God who hears our prayers. I pray for my sisters who received news that devastated them. Be so close to them. Hold them in Your powerful care. Heal them, Father of us all. In unity may we raise our hands in praise to You, for in trouble and in ease, You are the sovereign God of the universe, and You are good.
I had a health scare last week. Found a lump. Every woman's worst fear. That tingling in my stomach where fear squeezes it tight. I knew I had to get my thinking straight so that the enemy's words would not become my own. I also knew I had to get to the doctor. During the week of waiting to see her, I struggled with fear over faith. What if I do have breast cancer? How does one who knows her Savior react? This one falls on her face before Him. I have had two of my best friends go home after having struggled through the ravages of this disease. I have another who is still vibrant and very much alive....Praise our Father!!!!!
Friday was the day of my appointment. Thursday I had to battle the voice of doom all day. Knowing my Father will take care of me in the deepest part of my heart. Friday morning I was face down calling out to the Lord, my Rock. Here is one of the things I love most about the Lord. He is listening to me. I knew it without question. As I cried out for mercy in this situation, I knew He had His hand on my head. And, trust me, just like you, I know what it is like to be in a one-way conversation when the other person has checked out. Is listening to me about as intently as a dead person. But the presence of my Father was palpable.
I had written in my Friday "Psalm Calm" about "seeing God's glory in the land of the living." Right before I went into my appointment for the check-up and mammogram, I received a text from my daughter, Vanessa. She had been praying over me that morning. Her continual prayer was that I would see God's glory in the land of the living. Said it just became her mantra. Then she read the daily "Psalm Calm." I knew my God had heard me. He just wanted to confirm that to me. Isn't He sweet? Who is sweeter than our Father?
At that point all I knew was that He had heard. The rest was up to Him. I belong to Him. Therefore, my blood pressure checked out normal...no panic attack. Assurance only that I had been heard. As the doctor put her hands on the lump in my breast, I felt like I was in front of a firing squad. Would they shoot or allow me to live?
"Hmmm," she mused. "I don't know what that is. But I am not too worried about it. Had a mammo lately?"
On to the X-ray tech. Waited an hour to get in, though I had an appointment. Stretching out the time. Learning patience. Hoping with my gynecologist that it was just a blob of fat or something. Mammogram is clear. On to ultra sound tech. Chatty. And I just want to know what she sees. Nothing. Then the doctor comes to check me manually again. Though she feels what I feel, she thinks it is nothing to worry about. Breast tissue. Pats my back. Sends me home.
I am still breathless with thanksgiving. My death sentence postponed. Raised to new life. Grateful beyond words because I know so many women will not get that news today, and did not on Friday.
I raise my hands to Your Most Holy Place. My God who hears our prayers. I pray for my sisters who received news that devastated them. Be so close to them. Hold them in Your powerful care. Heal them, Father of us all. In unity may we raise our hands in praise to You, for in trouble and in ease, You are the sovereign God of the universe, and You are good.
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