Psalm 36 - No Fear

An oracle within my heart concerning the transgression of the wicked person:


There is no dread of God before their eyes, for in his own eyes he flatters himself too much to discover and hate his sin.  The words of his mouth are malicious and deceptive.  He has stopped acting wisely and doing good.  Even on his bed he makes malicious plans.  He sets himself on a path that is not good and does not reject evil.    (vs. 1 - 4)


I was talking to my husband yesterday about a young woman I know who used to attend a vibrant church in our community.  She went mostly, I think, because her mother did.  As she grew old enough to make the choice not to go any more, she also decided she was too smart for God.  She is really smart!  Intellectually superior to most.  And that is why she no longer believes there is a god.  If there were one, she would know it. Period.

On this level, rebellion against revering God seems innocuous.  A person makes a decision to "not" believe.  But how does that change a life?  Oh, she thinks the Bible is a neat little literary masterpiece.  Such a tight story for a myth.  But the God pronounced there is just a big old gray bearded granddaddy with a grudge.  And Jesus?  A great man - perhaps a prophet.  A compelling story, don't you think?

This made me wonder how my thinking and my feeling would be adjusted if that is how I perceived God.  First of all, there would be nothing to fear.  He was not gonna get me!  No rules except the ones I set for myself...and others.  Because I would expect them to obey my rules though they are not spelled out exactly for my acquaintances.  Since I would have set myself up as my own god, I am pretty certain this heart of mine would become proud.  I would walk with a swagger.  No one tells me what I can and cannot do.  At first this might not be so obvious.  I would have to get used to the freedom to do whatever I want without real regard for others.  Oh, I would never admit this, but when push came to shove, I would be looking out for number one because I love my god.

Down the line, I would find myself mired (I know me) in a complicated situation or two that I walked into out of my own hubris.  Only then, No One would be looking out for my best interest but me.  The only wisdom guiding my life is what life has taught me, so I will become cynical.  Driven by disappointment, I probably would stop doing the wise thing and glam onto expedience.

Ultimately, without my God, I know I would become simply a survivor.  Survivors do whatever it takes to live. Because they are the only important person in the ultimate scheme of things.  When I rejected my God in my rebellious heart, I set myself on a wholly different path.  Good and evil became relative.  And I got to define them.  The lines already cross in a confusing muddle sometimes.  Semantics would certainly help me.  What one would consider to be murder, I might think of only as convenience.  What some might think is a lie, I could justify as just not wanting to stir a pot.  I could steal with impunity because, since I am a god to myself, my sense of entitlement has no bounds.

Most of all, though, I answer to no One.  Free at last!  Free at last!  Because I have declared to the universe that there is no God!  No more sin....or talk of it.  No more lines drawn in the sand.  No heavenly granddaddy peering at me with searing eyes ready to wield His heavenly switch against my lily white legs as soon as I step wrong.  I can do whatever I want!  Woo-hoo!

If my heart does not become too heady with the freedom of my unbelief, I know there will come a day when  I will miss my God.  For when I lose Him, I lose His love, protection, wisdom, and purpose.  If He does not exist, I am aimless and without direction.  Oh, you say, I can be about doing good in this world without believing in the Christian God.  But works are not what I would miss.  I would miss Him.  I know there are people who have rejected the idea of God.  Rather than redefine Him, it is easier just to dismiss Him.  But I know He does not love me for my good works.  He loves me because I am a child He died to save.

That is why David entitled this an oracle from within his own heart.  Look!!!  This is what happens when you flatter yourself into thinking you are all there is.  The path is not good.  Because you walk it all alone.